Recommend changes to the following:

- the first sentence should spell out your intention to file a formal complaint on behalf of several customers. Did should grab their intention as the content is kinda long
-... if the date given is after ???? December, 2009

From the BBB point of view, you have to give a reason why you consider this Decemeber date to be important. I would mention:
- several other retailers having it in stock. amazon, buy.com with date+screenshot
- nokiausa themselves seem to have it out of stock, so Mmmmmm
- menion the loss of the $50 rebate as another reason to receive it by X date