It absolutely kills me to thank you on your suggestion, ukki. Especially since there is no such option.

There is a -nosound though.

Well, I tried
mplayer -fps 0 -srate 48000 /media/mmc2/file.avi
but that just defaulted to normal play

mplayer -fps 1 -srate 48000 /media/mmc2/file.avi
This works but I still get about the same amount of music stutter and chunkiness as if I were to play it normally.

Maybe I'll mess around with making the display resolution of the video to 1x by 1y and see if that doesn't look pretty. *lol*

Your suggestion almost worked, bun. But the music is only playing at around 90% speed.

Ah screw it. I'm just going to use Ukki's Knots port and call me happy.